My grandparents aren't getting any younger, but that being said, I'm convinced that my mother's parents are going to be around for another 10 years or more at least and they are 94 and 92. Unlike most, up till February of this year, I had all of my grandparents still living. My Grandma Perrin died this year of what I am convinced is stubbornness...she should have lived a much longer life but at 90, she still lived with my Grandfather in their home of 68 years and continued to cook, clean and bathe herself despite being blind from macular degeneration. Third degree burns from getting into a bathtub from the chest down and not being able to quickly extradite herself resulted in a trip to the hospital after spending two days on the couch in and out of consciousness in her nightdress, convinced that a doctor was unnecessary. I come from some tough people....it gives me strength and also sometimes is to my detriment. We have more guts than you can hang on a fence in our family and wear it proudly.
We went home to spend some time, something I haven't done in 5 years because its always a challenge and not just financially. You see, because I not only descend from strong relatives, but also from some crazy ones too and despite my best intentions, I always seem to draw the short straw. As my Aunt put it, for some reason, I always end up in a Lose/Lose position, no matter how desperate I am to please everyone, I end up pleasing no one. I really should just learn to say," Fuck it!" and do what's best for me, but I genuinely love people, love making them happy and see no reason to segregate that love, one family or person at a time. However there are some that think otherwise.
I did my best to stick to the budget, but vacations will do you in much faster than being kicked to death by grasshoppers. If it wasn't for the wine or the gas or the hotel rooms or the pleasure of buying things for family or friends it would be so damn easy, but after 10 months of living off of a $500 grocery budget and entertaining ourselves with board games, it's REALLY hard in the presence of others simply enjoying their lives to not say,"TO HELL WITH IT!".
I also went home because my Grandpa Perrin, who will be 90 in October, decided that it was time to let his car go. This is a big deal. My Grandparents may have lived in a war time home, but there was always a shiny new vehicle in their driveway after retirement. My Grandpa's cars were his pride and joy...washed and waxed weekly and replaced by the latest model every couple of years. He paid cash, didn't dicker on the sticker price and ALWAYS bought Chryslers.
Our plan was to try and ride out our Crappy Chevy Cavalier for another 3 years until the car payments were up on my Hyundai. Completely unrealistic plan since the damn Chevy crapped out on us on the day I was to fly out to Ontario to start my vacation but we are still dealing with our lack of insightful financial planning and will be for years to come. You see, smart, financially responsible people sock away money for that eventuality but most of us just wing it and then freak out when, "Holy Shit!", our 25 year old dishwasher dies on us. I mean, really, why don't they make things like they used to? I remember when dishwasher's used to last like 50 years. Man, we weren't planning to start saving to replace that appliance for, like another ten years at the least. Crap!!
When my Grandpa heard from my father, who unlike us, recognized that our car was a piece of crap on its last legs, mentioned that we might need a vehicle, Grandpa was quick to offer the car to us as a gift. For us, it was an amazing offer, one that helped us immensely but was also so difficult to accept. Every time I thought about taking Grandpa's car, I would cry and trust me when I say that I can count on two hands, the amount of times I've cried in my lifetime. It's an annoying investment of snotty nose, runny red eyes and kleenex. Hate doing it and wish there was a simple, cheap way to stop it.
I'm not joking!!! I asked my optician if there was a way of surgically fixing it this week after another horrible jag of it to find a medical way to reverse it. She let me know that they still don't know why we emotionally cry. Science still hasn't figured it out!! Why aren't we putting some good quality research dollars into this? She gave me some drops to sort out my condition and let me know that the reason why our eyes feel like crap after bawling is that the saline in our tears strips our eyes of their natural oils and essentially dries them out. It takes a day to allow the eye to build up those oils again, so you can use some artificial drops to lube up those those eyes in the meantime, that is, if you accidentally stumble into a theatre showing the last few minutes of Lassie.
We have a lot to celebrate so I will start with the good...
1) Our Chevy Cavalier has been replaced by a Chrysler 300 that's barely been driven in the last five years. It had 34,000 kms on it until I drove it home and is a 2005. It needs a bit of work since its been sitting to the tune of $500 plus, but my trusty mechanic assures me that it is in excellent condition and once the work is completed will be a great vehicle for years to come.
2) We had help with our vacation on flights and gas. Our grandparents and my Dad generously assisted with the cost of getting us there and home which we had saved for, but abruptly lost those savings when our furnace needed to be replaced to the tune of $10,000. This is WHY you should plan for equipment in your house that is getting aged, socking money away for the eventuality that things, just like people don't last forever.
3) Our bosom buddies and sister wife family put us up for 10 days of extended family gatherings donating vacation time and expenses despite being mistreated by a couple of the selected above crazy people in my family. We are eternally grateful that they still want anything to do with us at all since having spent most of their lives with relatively normal, slightly quirky folks, they got a first hand 3D experience with what it's like to be in my world. They also now know why my preference is for them to see me in the Maritimes and not the other way round.
4) We celebrated our first Austerity Measures Budget Goal prior to leaving for vacation. Say goodbye to $24,000 worth of roofing debt with the last payment made in June!!! Between the scheduled payments we stuck to and our tax return, we were able to beat our initial deadline by 6 months. We officially have one borrowing account paid off and one credit card at 0% interest for only six months paid off. It can be done and I will be doing an end of year budget review to show you how in September.
Here is the bad...
1) Our furnace blew and so as much as we would love to celebrate $24,000 less, we had to take on $10,000 worth of new debt to get it replaced. The potentially good news is that with a more efficient system, we may save a lot on both our electricity bills and our oil bills come fall. We will keep you posted on this one, since some of you may be considering how much it would save you to replace an old oil furnace. This will hit our bottom line in our monthly budget and may mean that we can sock more away towards the debt giving us less time in debt repayment mode or we could choose to have more disposable income and bust a move buying some twinkies at the grocery store to live life in the fast lane.
2) The other good news is that we had $10,000 worth of line of credit space to be able to deal with this debt at a low interest rate and not on our credit card which would be a nightmare. Had this furnace bust occurred when we were living in spending denial...we would have been screwed and in major financial trouble. If you are getting close to not having ANY readily available credit beyond your credit cards and if you are living with a balance on those credit cards...you, my friend are living in credit card denial. It's time to wake up and get them paid off. No joke....its completely stupid to be paying 28.8% interest.
3) You know its bad when you book an appointment at your car mechanics and he says,"Are you sure you want to come in on Monday? Andrew usually books his appointments on Saturdays." I had to explain that yes, Andrew's days off are Saturdays....but mine are Mondays. This has got to be your first clue that you are spending way too much time and money fixing cars.
3 b) Grandpa's car is going in on Monday for a minimum repair of $500 plus and now the Crappy Cavalier that we just had towed and fixed to the tune of $600 just had the engine light pop on when I was driving it to work this morning. Really?!!! From now on, I am driving a bejesus bicycle...... wind, rain, snow or shine! To hell with these mechanized horses ready for pasture! Put that Chevy to rest my head tells me.....anybody interested in a fabuloso deal on a wonderful car? Reliable and I will even throw in some snake oil that will give you the biggest something, something you've ever seen to please your lady friend....if you know what I mean.
4) I set a budget for my vacation weeks of $400 per week for the two weeks I was in Ontario. I blew it. This means I will need to extend our timeline for debt repayment for another month. Sucks...yes, but life is short. I could get hit by a bus tomorrow and my family and friends are worth it. Not the death by bus, but you know what I mean.
The ugly...
1) A close family member has blocked me from facebook after our wonderful family reunion. Good thing I blew the budget on them! Does this mean that she doesn't love me anymore or does it mean I'm dealing with someone who has the mental age of 10? Only time will tell....I'm placing my bets on the second. Luckily, this has little effect on our financial well being. However I may be getting anthrax in the mail this Christmas....
2) We have a hell of a long way to go. Based on our proposed timeline of debt repayment as per our previous blog...even when we do pay off the flood ($8000 left) and the furnace ($10,000 to go), we still have a lot of Casa Cayendo to deal with and three kids to send to schooling so they don't need to be dummies like us.
2 b) Most importantly, we need to stick to the damn budget, which is friggin' hard. Prostitution sometimes seems tempting, easier and quicker to earn a few dollars than the way we are going about it. I'm sure I could put Andrew out for stud if I hadn't already sent him to the SPCA to get fixed. Hell, I've still got all my teeth....must be worth something! Clipping coupons, staying in, engaging the kids in home-made puppet shows and canning our own ketchup seems like oodles of fun, but trust me, it can be hard unless your neighbors are Mennonites.
3) It could be so much worse....my kids are at an age when they could finally appreciate the stories that my grandparents, their great- grandparents have to share. Grandma and Grandpa told us of what it was like to live through German Nazi occupation of Holland. She told me of the weeks worth of bombing that killed her brother as he was working in another neighborhood. She shared with me the moment when her sister was screaming at her, "Why are you still sewing that dress when they are bombing the hell out of us?!!!". My grandmothers reply was,"Well, I can keep sewing this dress or I can sit there worrying the hell out of myself and do nothing. I'd rather make a damn dress!!!". Like I said before, I have guts for garters, thanks to the women before me.
Albert Einstein said," There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
I had a tough week this week. Not as tough as anything my Grandma's have EVER had to deal with. However, dealing with family matters that have gutted me, a cat that disappeared for 3 days, a budget blown and a genuine gesture of friendship that turned awkward...at the end of the day, it was no big deal.
Everyday is a new day and you can fix it. Trust me, I know first hand and have had the best of intentions blown up in my face more often than not. Put your big girl panties or big boy boxers on and get to work!! Stick to your guts and spread them out on the fence...only good things will come. This I know for sure.
We are your average Canadian family and we have a second chance at happiness in so many ways..............
